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The work of birth support & bodywork was not a plan; it was more of a calling. Much of the journey took fruition in graduate school when I started to receive massages as a way to manage stress. I was astounded by how much better I would feel: my muscle tension would subside and my mood and focus would boost for days. One day, while re-energized from a massage and researching for a literature class, I came across articles on trauma and how emotions and memories are stored in the body, particularly the article The Body Keeps the Score before it was published as a now bestselling book. It was then that my deep passion towards bodywork and somatics began to stir, and I decided to apply to massage school as I was completing my Master's thesis.
While attending The Center for Natural Wellness School of Massage Therapy, I did my independent project on trauma as I learned about the infinite, fascinating body. It was also during this time that I first heard the word “doula” (though I had already supported a few births, I didn’t have a name for this work). I hired doulas for the birth of my own children; birthing my son and then daughter were very challenging, beautiful, life altering experiences, and I couldn’t imagine going through those journeys without the support of doulas.
I've survived.
I've survived immense trauma.
And you may have too, in one form or another, or, as Bayo Akomolafe has so eloquently said, trauma is in the fabric of the land.
We are here, together, creating beauty and soft spaces, on this vast, unpredictable, chaotic land.
More than a decade ago, when I started practicing massage, I knew that more than touching the surface of bodies, I wanted to facilitate the process of igniting wise, ancient, expansive parts of my clients.
What I've come to realize is that the expansive places I must turn to are within my own inner landscape.
As I continue to understand that the work is through me, that I can only with-ness others when reaching self, that, in the words of Audre Lorde, "self-care is self preservation," that I can only go as far with others as I'm willing to go with myself, that the illusions of separation of mind and body, and the separation of self and others will be illusions I'll continually dance and examine, and as I continue to return to these things again and again, I experience the process as a continual process, hence the language and understanding continues to evolve.
My experiences as a mother and as a birth and bodyworker has led me to one of my most important truths: it is through the art of mothering and nurturing ourselves that we are able to mother and nurture others. I mother myself by receiving bodywork, through somatic practices: through showing up as my authentic, vulnerable self. I work to share these same acts of love and to provide a safe space for each person who entrusts me as their birthworker or bodyworker.
The work I do, be it personal or professional, is my art and heart and a catalyst for feeling alive, present, and embodied.
Outside of bodywork and birth, other passions that bring me to life: writing, performance art, dancing, deep stretching, studying astrology and tarot, moon watching, meditating via music, nourishing podcasts and books, loving wholeheartedly, napping (especially with my Siamese cat curled by my head), and laughing with my two very spirited children.
*Natural induction support on a case by case bases, never prior to 38 weeks gestation and with approval from your midwife or obstetrician.
All photos on this page were captured by the one and only Jayana LaFotos
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